The Circus

Have you ever felt like your pew at church is a circus gone bad? ...I have. And yesterday was no exception.

The family meeting (sacrament meeting) is the last of three meetings here. I decided to feed baby before it started. As we were finishing up I heard a squeal in the hall... oh no... that's The Bub. We went out into the hall and he just needed his nuk(binkie). So I gave it to him and we went back to our seats.

Everyone was happy for about 10 min. Then all of a sudden, The Bub chucks his nuk two rows in front of us. So the kind people in the row pick it up and pass it back. He gets it and turns around and throws it behind us. The kind people behind us pick it up and give it back.

Now you are saying, "Why on earth are you giving it back to him?!?!" Well, not only does he throw it, but as soon as he throws it he points and screams for it...until he gets it back. So this happened about four times or so.

Meanwhile, baby decides she is not happy sitting. She only falls asleep if she is bounced, so I start bouncing her in my arms. This isn't working and she is getting louder. So... The Bub is screaming and launching his nuk at the folks around us and baby is yelling at me. I just looked at my husband in disbelief and we both got up, each with a kiddo, and went out in the foyer.

The Bub wasn't happy because I didn't bring his nuk, so my husband was basically dragging him. **Note: You have to understand, as I am sure you do... even though it sounds like The Bub is just a brat, church is long and he is tired (which is NOT a good thing), so it is just really hard on him. That being said, he is still the worst behaved child in the meeting.... So, we went into a small room and I stayed with The Bub while my husband walked baby around the halls.

The Bub did not like that dad was gone, so he really got sad. I asked him if he wanted to go sit by daddy and he smiled and said, "Daaie!" Now when The Bub smiles it is the sweetest thing and it is really hard to believe he is the same Bub that resembled more of a beast the minute before. I asked him to hold my hand and said we had to be really good to sit by Daddy. And we walked quietly and happily out of the room.

When we got back into the meeting, Daddy wasn't there because he was still walking baby, but it was ok. We sat down and I pulled out a colored pencil and notebook for The Bub to draw with and that kept him occupied for 10 min or so (usually I can't get him to color, so this is big!).

When Daddy finally got back in and sat down, it wasn't two seconds before baby was crying again. So I took her and got up to leave. Earlier The Bub had asked for his nuk again, so I had given it to him and after a minute he had tossed it into the seat in front of us. I had hurried and picked it up and put it behind me and had gotten him interested in coloring again. So when I got up to leave, I forgot and left it. Sure enough, when I peeked back inside, he had it in his mouth.

When baby finally fell asleep I went back in and sat down. Everything was fine for a while. I could feel the end drawing nearer and was hoping everything would stay calm for just a few more minutes. I pulled out some crackers and his truck and tried to keep him happy and his attention shifting from one thing to the other. But... during the closing song... he chucked his nuk... and screamed.

So, I picked him up to leave. The closing song was over now and the prayer was about to be said, and as we approached the door, he let out the loudest, longest, blood curdling scream he could. As if that was the cue, all the other kids in the room started up. ...And we had the shortest closing prayer I have ever heard.

Now, I have sat by disruptive children before and it is hard to hear and to really pay attention to what is being said. I don't want to disrupt anyone in church. But... we are doing our best. If the meeting was not supposed to have kids in it, it wouldn't. But it is a family meeting. So... we do our best to teach our children reverence, to keep them quiet, and take them out when they are not... but that is all we can do. I WILL NOT feel guilty or irritated every week because my
child is irreverent. I just won't. I WILL do what I have to do while trying to catch as much as I can of what is being said.

Amazingly enough, amongst all of the chaos yesterday, I actually heard two GREAT talks that helped my testimony of the gospel grow. That just goes to show, you can feel the holy spirit anywhere... even in a circus:-).