Our place is for sale and yesterday the Realtor showed it to a potential buyer. I tried to get it as clean as I could and then we left while they were looking. Later on in the day I thought, "You know, you just can't hide the kind of lifestyle you live. It can be really clean and pleasant, but I can't hide the fact that it is a modest place. You just can't pretend to have something you don't."Now I am not ashamed of our home or how we live. Having people come into my home just made me feel exposed and made me think. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for us, or envy us for that matter, it just helped me reflect on some things.
Just like I can't hide the house that I live in, we can't hide the people we are either. So why do we try??? What is there to be ashamed of? And why can't we be ok with how we are - just how we are, not "If only I were this dress size" or "If only my hair was longer" or "If only I had cuter clothes" or "If only I were better at this or that, etc. etc... then I would be happy with myself." (I have thought all of these things and much more at one time or another... maybe even at the same time). Why are we so hard on ourselves?
I was in the gym the other day and saw a mirror and thought, "There is just no hiding that I have some extra lbs to loose is there?" And so what!! That is how I am right now. It is almost like it is ok for everyone else to just be the way they are, but for us, however we are is just unacceptable or not quite good enough.
Of course we should be trying to improve ourselves (in every way), but as we try to do the right things, can't we also just LOVE ourselves for who we are?!? Why not think we are just great??? Kids do and look how happy they are!! The Bub thinks he is adorable - that is so healthy! Whenever he sees a mirror he gets the biggest smile on his face and starts dancing around and watching himself and wanting me to watch. And no he is not comparing himself to other kids to think that. He just thinks he is great. What if we all felt that good about ourselves? Wouldn't the world be a better place? Unless of course... we became obsessed with ourselves and spent all day looking in the mirror... then we would be a vain people ripe for destruction.... hmmmm....... Anyway, you get my point:)....
Just some thoughts I had. I think Heavenly Father is sad when we don't take care of ourselves, which includes loving ourselves. So I will stop looking for places to hide and just be me... and love it:-).
I read a very good post by a relative of a good friend of mine that is about a similar topic. I don't actually know her, but her blog is public so I don't think she will mind that I found her blog and that I am sharing it with you.
2 comments:
Kimmmie, I liked this post a lot! It is so much easier to just be ourselves,no pretense.
I am also realizing how important it is to actually live in the moment and not long for something or somewhere or sometime in the future or the past for that matter.
(not to say we don't plan for the future and learn from the past, but we need to enjoy the here and now!)
KIm, I appreciate your sharing the thoughts you have. I know it might seem a little hard to you, but it is probably good therapy for you just to put it into words. You are a special person with fine talents, a beautiful smile and most important, as you obviously realize, the priority of your motherhood. It took Howard quite a while to find you, but when he did, he recognized your value and we are glad he did.
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